How many of us struggled through Anatomy and Physiology in High School yet now we are aces when it comes to Lactic Acid, Sodium Intake, Urine Analysis, Proteins and Carbohydrates…  And speaking about High School ……why is it … I could never work through unlatching a dates bra strap …..yet I can clip on my helmet strap one HRMonitorhanded in full stride, or pop the clasp on my heart rate monitor strap like it was prom night?

We sport great tans in the summer but they stop at out thighs and the tops of our biceps.  We wake up before our spouses and are asleep before the kids.  We have more race t-shirts than we know what to do with but can’t seem to throw them away… so we gift them to our kids as night gowns or use them to clean our bikes….AKA our mechanical buddies…We eat like the world is going to end any minute and never feel guilty about it…when our jaws hurt from all the eating we blend anything still left in the house…and drink it no matter what color it is.. and we smell…Chlorine, pond water, salt, and good mix of sweat is our Eau de Cologne….

Triathletes think that Boinking is good thing but Bonking is a bad thing…. There is a joke there somewhere …

Triathletes truly are wired differently than most of the world …we speak about our run, bike and swim mileage in a way that makes people cringe, grease up our privates before long rides like we are a barbecue rack of ribs ….  We have more work out gear around the house than we have normal every day wear…. And we sniff just about anything we put on ….even if it has just come out of the dryer (again, because we smell)… we work really hard not blow snot on ourselves but then wipe the residual on our sleevstack woodes…Our work ethic is considered insane…we take on extreme workouts and make them into playtime.  Ask your average triathlete to stack wood and this is what you would get…

And what are we moving billboards… Most of us advertise our training groups, events, 10615548_443169195823826_6729197683513122245_nclubs, or favorite equipment like we were being paid for it…  take a look at our race kits (Shorts, Shirts, Socks, Hats, etc).  While watching Ironman Mont Tremblant one finisher wore a plain green shirt and black shorts… no advertisement on either of them, just plain… I caught myself thinking that’s weird…  Then realized I was weird not Mr. Blank Man….

So when you look in the mirror next time take a good long glance…  See the Triathlete 20x30-CQBA0795staring back at you that ….cries while watching Triathlon  finishers … That pee’s in his/her wet suit and thinks it’s normal behavior…and that it feels comfortable and warm like being in the womb…We speed through T1 and T2 but are always last to get ready on date night….  We are a ridiculous paradox of humans… and we make me laugh.

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